Roguelikes

content/man-from-the-restaurant.en.md

@@ -70,96 +70,158 @@ And you look at all this... Ah... Unfortunate creatures of God and the Creator!
 
 ## II
 
-**work in progress**
+We lived quietly and unseen, and then suddenly it began and kept on... It went at such a terrible pace, in a whirl... It was a Sunday. I had gone to early mass - though Kolyushka always mocked my every religious effort - and was drinking my tea unhurriedly, since that day the restaurant wasn't to open until noon. And we had cabbage pies. Present too was the barber, my friend Kirill Saveryanich, who was in the highest spirits - having read the Apostle with exceptional clarity during the liturgy - and was holding forth on politics and the nature of life. He only held forth like this on holidays, for - as he rightly explained - weekdays were meant for tireless labor, and holidays for useful discourse. And when he began to speak of religion and faith in the Almighty Creator, I - owing to my lack of education, as Kirill Saveryanich later put it - murmured against learned men, saying they relied too much on their science and intellect in their wisdom, and had no wish to acknowledge God. I said this from the bitterness of my soul, because Kolyushka would never set foot in a church. And I said that giving children an education is a bitter thing, for it can utterly ruin them. Then my Koluyshka spoke up:
 
-We lived on quietly and unnoticed, but then suddenly everything started moving and kept going... It all started in such a terrible manner... It was exactly Sunday, after I went to early mass, although Kolyushka always laughed at all my religious efforts; I was drinking tea slowly on the occasion that the restaurant was going to open at noon that day. And we had cabbage pies, and there was a barber, my friend  Kirill Saveryanich, who was in a very cherful mood - he read the Apostle very clearly during the liturgy - and talking about politics and the nature of life. Holidays were the only days he talked at, for, and he was right about it, weekdays are meant for tireless labor, and holidays - for useful conversations. And when he started to speak of religion and faith in the mighty creator, due to my lack of education, as Kirill Saveryanich then said, I murmured against knowledgable people that they as people of mind too much rely on their science and brain, and do not desire to recognize God. And I said that from grief of my soul, because Kolyushka would never go to church. And I said that it is paining to give education to children, for it is a way to ruin them. Then my Koluyshka said:
+"You, Papa, understand nothing of science and are in error." He even stopped eating his pie. "You," he said, "know neither science nor even faith and religion!.."
 
-"You, dad, know nothing of science and are delusioned," he even stopped eating the pie, "You" he continued "You know neither science nor even faith and religion!.."
+I don't know faith and religion! So, I wanted to set him straight. I said:
 
-That I don't know faith and religion! So, I wanted to make him understand. I responded:
+"You have no right to speak to your father like that! You are lying! I admit I never mastered your sciences, of course, or study geography and the like, but I'm the one who set you on your feet, and I want to grant you the station of a gentleman - so you would be no worse than others, and not end up some lackey, as you speak of me..." - Oh, how he winced! - "And if I did not believe in religion, I would have despaired of life long ago and ended it, perhaps even by suicide! So you study, but you have no true nobility in you... And it is bitter to me, bitter..."
 
-"You have no right - and to your father! You are lying! Of course, I never got to the bottom of your science, I didn't study geography and the like, but I want to get you on your feet and grant you the lot of noble people, that you are no worse than others; - and not in the lackeys... as you address me," how he winced! "And if I did not believe in religion, I would have long despaired of life and ended it, perhaps even by suicide! You are studying, but you there is no nobility in you... And it is painful to me, painful..."
+And Kirill Saveryanich even bowed his head to the table in agreement, but Kolyushka, for his part, retorted:
 
-And Kirill Saveryanich even bowed his head to the table in agreement, but Koluyshka said on the contrary:
+"Spare me your long-winded sermons! If," he said, "everything were revealed to you, then you would understand what true nobility is. And your prayers to God are pointless - if he even exists!"
 
-"Stop your long edifying speeches! If you were to reveal everything, you would understand what nobility is. And your prayers to God are unnecessary, if he even exists!"
+But what was this! Here I was speaking of faith and religion, and he just stuck to his own tune... I cursed myself for ever putting him on the scholarly path. Hauling books by the armful, sitting up all night, all the kerosene he burned through. And then there was that Vasikov from the road administration, who’d come to see him - consumptive, probably... And Kolyushka himself grew thin and bitter, like a plagued man.
 
-How can that be! I am speaking about faith and religion, but he stands on his ground... I was cursing myself that I let him onto the academic path. How he carried armfuls of books and sat up at night, how much kerosene he used up. And then there was Vasikov, who would visit him from the road administration, possibly suffering from consumption... And he, Koluyshka, became thin and angry, like a plague victim...
+I shook my finger at him for his words about the Creator, and Kirill Saveryanich shot him such a look - he was quite capable of that, his mouth sometimes twisting into a sneer - when suddenly Kolyushka leaped up! And he began to curse everyone... even... certain prominent persons, calling them every name imaginable - it was terrifying. And Kirill Saveryanich grew uneasy, coughing repeatedly and glancing out the window.
 
-I wagged my finger at him for his words about the creator, and Kirill Saveryanich looked at him in such a way - he was very capable of doing so, and his mouth would sometimes twist into a sneer, - but Koluyshka jumped up! And he began to swear at everything and everyone... even... some known kinds people, calling them all sorts of names, - it was frightening; and Kirill Saveryanich became anxious and kept coughing and glancing out the window.
+"A waste of all your efforts!" he shouted. "And I know just what kind of nobility you want! It's all so that..." Here he began jabbing a finger at his own chest through his jacket. "I'd rather grind stones on the street than give you such pleasure!"
 
-"All your aspires were to vain!" he screamed "Oh, and I know what kind of nobility you need! All is simply for..." here he started to poke himself through the jacket "I'd rather grind stones on the streets than give you such pleasure!"
+Like a madman! Ah! What was the point of all my efforts? Why did I plead with the school's director to waive the fees? Solely because he used to dine at our restaurant, and I would attend to him, and I'd ask the chef, Alexei Fomich, to take special care. In recognition of my service, they granted the favor. Then I had to submit three petitions detailing our need and expenses... how many times did I cut them short - which you can manage when you have connections with the kitchen steward - and how much effort it took to gain his attention! And for all that, such words!
 
-Like a madman! Ah! What was I even bothering for? Why did I ask the school principal to exempt us from paying fees? And only because he had been to our restaurant and I had catered to him and asked chef Alexei Fomich to take excellent care; and he, in recognition of my services, granted the discount. And then, three times I had to submit a petition explaining our needs and bills... how many times did he cut them short (it is possible when there are connections in the kitchen), how many I earned attention! And for all that, such words!
+But then Kirill Saveryanich himself began to reason with him:
 
-But then Kirill Saveryanich himself began to explain to him:
+"You are still a very young man," he said, "full of passion, and you have not yet grasped the full depth of the sciences. Science gradually draws a person toward true nobility and provides the eternal key to happiness!" He spoke so remarkably! "Faith and religion, meanwhile, soften the spirit. And so," he continued, "see what becomes of science: I am, of course, a barber just now," he said, "and if not for the scientific perfection of machines, I would need a full ten minutes with my scissors, even with my skill as an excellent master. But once the machine was invented, I can do it in one minute. So it is with everything. And the time will come when scientists will invent such machines that they will do all things. Even now they extract much from the air by machine, even sugar. And when all that comes to pass, then everyone will rest and contemplate nature. And that is why the sciences must be studied, as noble and educated men do, while the rest of us must for now endure and believe in God’s providence. Do not forget this!"
 
-"You are still very young, with a passion, and you haven't reached all the depths of science yet. Science slowly propels a human towards true nobility and unlocks the eternal key to happiness!" He spoke just wonderfully, "Faith and religion, additonally, softens the spirit. And see what will happen to science. Right now I am, of course, a barber, and if it weren't for the scientific perfection of the machines, I would have to cut hair with scissors for ten minutes, using my skills as a very good master. But once they invented the hair clipper, I can do it in a minute. That's all. And the time will come when scientists will invent machines that will do everything. And now they already extract a lot from the air with machines, even sugar. And when all this happens, then everyone will relax and explore nature. And that is why we must study science, as noble and educated people do, while we must all be patient and believe in God's providence. Don't you forget that!
+I quite agreed with these wise words, but Kolyushka would not relent and assailed Kirill Saveryanich with his own:
 
-I quite agreed with these wise words, but Kolyushka did not let up and bombarded Kirill Saveryanich with his words:
+"I don't want to hear this nonsense! So... in your opinion, the horse should just die waiting for the grass to grow? It's all well for you, selling perfume and shaving the faces of fine gentlemen without doing any real labor yourself! All you do is dye and polish, cover their bald spots so they look refreshed!"
 
-"I do not want your nonsence! Ah! In your opinion, should the horse die while waiting for the grass to grow? You are comfortable selling perfume and shaving the faces of various gentlemen without doing any work yourself! All you do is dyeing and polishing, covering their bald spots so that they look refreshed!"
+Kirill Saveryanich grew angry - for he was a proud man - and even choked on his words.
 
-Kirill Saveryanich became angry, as he was very proud; even chocked.
+"The Gospels," he said, "learn them first, then I will reason with you! I have studied philosophy! First read as much as I have read, then... I could even instruct your teacher, let alone..."
 
-"The Gospel," he says, "learn it first, then I'll talk to you! I've studied philosophy! First read as many books as I have read, then... I'll teach your teacher, don't you dare..."
+He kept jabbing a finger at his own chest. And my son was no less… for every word of his, Kolyushka had five! He’d read a great deal himself.
 
-All with his finger to his chest. And my son is no less... Ten words against one! He too read a lot. 
+"Ah! So now you turn to the Gospels! Well, I'll serve them up right under your nose! I'll lay out your faith point by point and shove it in your face! I'll present your precious machines in numbers, I'll choke the streets with rags! Is that the Gospel you want?! You," he cried, "you keep your accounts for shaves and haircuts on its pages now!.."
 
-"Ah... Now are you talking about the Gospel! Well, I shall truly present it to you. I will lay out all the points of your faith! I'll show you your machines in numbers, I'll fill the streets with rags! Is this the Gospel you need?! You" he says," now enter shaving and haircuts on its account!.."
+He carried on like a rabid dog. My son is very hot-tempered and sensitive - well, in that too, God did not stint him. He paced the room, jabbing his fingers, shaking his fist; he launched into talk of life, of politics - of everything. And surnames leaped from his speech. He invoked renowned and illustrious men... he quoted them. And of history... where things come from, how they unfold. He had read a great many books. And it was all about how things should be, and how they are, and this is where the nobility of life lies!
 
-Acting like a mad dog. He, my son, is very hot-tempered and sensitive. Well, and in this, too, he is not lacking. He runs around the room, jabs his finger, threatens with a fist; he starts to speak of life, of politics - of everything. And all the surnames jump out of his speech. And he mentions many glorious people... And about history... And how things come to light, and where from. He read a lot. And, all is as in, that's how it should be, and that's how it is, and that's what makes life noble!
+Kirill Saveryanich appeared quite deflated and merely twisted his mouth in reply. But this weakness was just for show; all the while he was preparing his speech. And he began very politely, even with a gesture of his hand:
 
-Kirill Saveryanich had gotten completely weakened and only contorted his mouth in response. Though his weakening was only for a show; in the meantime he was actually preparing his speech. And he began politely, even waving his hand in a manner:
+"That is merely empty talk and sophistry on your part. All this talk of yours is violence, and such things do not exist in real life. Just think it over carefully, and everything will become clear to you. I know politics quite well, and I consider that..."
 
-"That's just empty talk and sophistry on your part. All this violence doesn't happen in life. Only think about it carefully, and everything will become clear to you. I know politics very well, and I think that..."
+But Kolyushka slammed his fist on the table - the dishes jumped. He is broad-shouldered and strong, my son, but far too hot-headed.
 
-But Kolyushka hit the table with his fist - even the dishes clattered. He, my son, is well-built and strong, but very hot on his head.
+"Well, you leave the thinking to us, and just go on shaving your customers' mugs!"
 
-"Well, leave all the thinking to us, and you just shave snouts of your customers!" 
+It was a deeply insolent thing to say. And again, Kirill Saveryanich spoke quietly and distinctly:
 
-It was very daring to say. And Kirill Saveryanich again - quietly and clearly:
+"Hold on, don't go breaking the dishes. You're not even drunk yet! And besides, who is this 'us' you speak of? This 'us,'" he said, "will finish their education, become engineers, build little bridges here, lay out pathways... Then the money will come flowing in, you'll have gloves on your hands, and things will be tight here and there, with plenty set aside and tucked away. Little houses, ladies in low-cut gowns... You won't even wish to speak with our sort then - the kind who shave faces... Oh no, you wait now, don't you try to shut my mouth! You'll do that later, when I'm the one shaving you... And you'll read your little books and utter all sorts of fine words—more than you know what to do with! And with those gloved hands of yours, you'll grab certain people by the nail, by the throat... We've seen it all, I tell you - more than we know what to do with! And that's the truth! The real truth... the truth is by [Peter and Paul](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_and_Paul_Fortress)!"
 
-"Stop with breaking the dishes. You are not even drunk! And then, who are those "us"? "Us" - he says - let them finish education, become an engineer; to build little bridges here and there, consturct pathways... When money will float your way, and your hands are in tight gloves, and it's tight here and there. And little houses, and ladies in low-cut tops... You won't even speak to our kind, those that shave snouts... No, you wait now, don't you shut my mouth! You will do it later, when I get to shave you... And you will read your little books, and all kinds of good words... nowhere to spare! And with those little gloved hands, you grab someone by the fingernail and by the neck... We have seen it all, - nowhere to spare! And that is truth! The truth is... is by the Pyotr and Pavel!
+He swept it all away, laid it all to waste. What an extraordinary mind! Kolyushka merely squinted and muttered aside:
 
-, and it's tight here and there. And little houses, and ladies in low-cut tops... You then won't even speak to our kind, those that shave snouts... No, you wait now, don't you shut my mouth! You will do it later, when I get to shave you... And you will read your little books, and all kinds of good words... nowhere to spare! And with those little gloved hands, you grab someone by the fingernail and by the neck... We have seen it all, - nowhere to spare! And that is truth! The truth is... is by the Pyotr and Pavel!
+"You speak from experience, I see! But allow me to ask, how much do you squeeze from your own apprentices?"
 
-Went and smashed it all to pieces. A real genius, he is! Kolyushka squinted and - to the side:
+Kirill Saveryanich had just opened his mouth when Lusha rushed in, waving her arms, her face a picture of terror. And to Kolyushka she said:
 
-"You know this from experience! But permit me ask, how much do you charge your craftsmen?
+"Have pity on your mother, at least! You'll be the ruin of us all! Crooked must have heard everything!.."
 
- Kirill Saveryanich only opened his mouth when Lusha rushed in, waving her hands; with fear portrayed on her face. And - to Kolyushka:
+Ah, good Lord! We'd forgotten all about him - the very one we kept meaning to chase away. A most inscrutable man, judging by his doings. He’d once worked in a rubber-goods shop, it seems, and his wife had run off with a district officer. He'd rented a little room from us, its window overlooking the rubbish heap, and every evening he would come home drunk and raise a row. Straight for the guitar on the wall and the waltz ["Irretrievable Time"](https://youtu.be/X3cf0zj168g) until three in the morning. He let no one sleep, and if you complained - instant scandal:
 
-"Have pity to your mother at least! You will ruin us all! Crooked must have heard everything!.."
+"You'll soon learn what I'm really made of! You think I'm some police clerk? You've got the wrong man! I have my own authority!"
 
-Ah, dear Lord! And we forgot about him - it's the one we wanted to chase away. It's not easy to figure out that man, by his deeds. Previously, as if, he had served in a store of rubber products, and his wife ran away. He rented our room with a window overlooking the garbage dump, and every evening he would come in and make uproar - with guitar from the wall, and the waltz ["Irretrievable Time"](https://youtu.be/X3cf0zj168g) until 3 after midnight. He wouldn't let anyone sleep, and if you reprimand, there will be a scandal right away:
+He downright intimidated us. And there was such a reckless boldness in his words, it was astonishing. At that hour! Sometimes he would leave his guitar and fall quiet. Lusha watched through the crack in the door. He would stand in the middle of his little room, ruffle up his hair and look all around. And he'd burn bedbugs with a candle under the wallpaper - you'd think he'd start a fire any moment! He hung over us like a fever.
 
-"I will show you what I am really like! You think I am a police commissioner? Wrong call! I have authority!"
+And so this very Crooked - his left eye was always half-closed - appeared right behind Lusha in a new jacket. His face was spiteful, and he was pointing a trembling finger at us. You could see by his eyes that he was already drunk.
 
-Plainly, intimidated us! And he had such bravery in his words that it was surprising. And at what hour! Sometimes he would leave his guitar be and remain silent. Lusha saw through a door latch. He would stand in the middle of the little room, ruffle his hair and stare around. And he would burn bedbugs with a candle under the wallpapers; watch out him starting a fire at any moment! He imposed himself on us like a plague.
+"So I've caught you red-handed! We-ell?! You took me for a police clerk - well, you've got the wrong man! But I'll see you reported for a political conversation! We-ell!.."
 
-And so that very Crooked - his left eye was always half-closed - appears right behind Lusha wearing a new jacket. His face was spiteful, and he pointed his finger at us with a terror. You could tell by his eyes that he was wasted.
+I knew he was a simple, foolish fellow - and now one all wound up - so I kept silent. Kolyushka turned away; he couldn't stand the man. But Kirill Saveryanich immediately began to placate him:
 
-"This is how I mark you! We-ell?! You took me for a commissioner - wrong call! I will make it so you are charged for a political debate! We-ell!.."
+"This is a scholarly debate, not about anything of that sort... And perhaps you'd care for a glass of tea?.."
 
-I know, he is a simple foolish person - now on edge; I remain silent. Kolyushka turned away: he disliked Crooked; and Kirill Saveryanich quickly started to recompose:
+Essentially, he handled the matter with great delicacy.
 
-"This is an argument about science, not about this and that... And would you like some tea..."
+"And we ourselves," he said, "are patriots, and not concerning anything of that kind... And I beg you, don't get the wrong idea. I even run a barbershop establishment..."
 
-Essentially, he led the conversation in a subtle manner.
+But Crooked only screwed up his eyes tighter and even turned to face us sideways.
 
-"And we," he says, "are patriots ourselves, and not about this and that... And you, please, entertain no idea. I even have a hairdressing establishment..."
+"Spare me your flattery! I can see how you regard me well enough without spectacles! Did I make an impression? We-ell? I could ruin every one of you, and in my educated soul I might even pity you for it. But since I've been scorned and driven from the apartment like the lowest scum, I cannot permit it! And if you are a lackey" - this was aimed at me - "then I am no man's..."
 
-But Crooked narrowed his eyes completely and even turned sideways.
+Very inappropriate. Then Kolyushka slung a glass at him - drenching his fancy new jacket. Everyone jumped up. Kirill Saveryanich seized Kolyushka by the arms, I blocked Crooked's path to the door to keep him from taking the scandal outside, Lusha was practically on her knees, imploring him to have mercy on our family's situation, and Natasha was there too - while Crooked just stood with his eyes bulging, drilling us with his stare and jabbing a finger at his own chest. What a bedlam they raised... And then our other lodger appeared, a musician who played at weddings on the big trumpet - Cherepakhin, Polycarp Sidorovich, a man of imposing physique... He went straight for Natasha:
 
-"Drop your flattery! I need no glasses to see your treatment! I made an impression?! We-ell? I, perhaps, will doom you all, and I even pity you, through my educated spirit. But since I was neglected and chased away from the apartment like I am the lowest scum, I cannot allow this! And if you are lackey," that was to me, "then I am before nobody..."
+"He hasn't hurt you? Please, remove yourself from this unpleasant scene..."
 
-Very inappropriate. Then, Kolyushka launched a glass into him: spilled all over his face and jacket. Everyone jumped up. Kirill Saveryanich grabbed Kolyushka by hands, I blocked the passage to the door, so Crooked cannot make a scandal outside, Lusha fell on her knees, begging him to understand the family situation, and Natasha too was here. Crooked widened his eyes and kept pointing his finger into his jacket. What a hell they all raised... Here appeared our another tenant, a musician attending weddings and playing a big trumpet, Cherepakhin by surname, Polycarp Sidorich. Excellent physique... And immediately to Natasha:
+And at once he turned on Crooked:
 
-"He didn't hurt you? Please remove yourself from the unpleasant conversation..."
+"If anything happens, I'll tear your head off! Damned insect! You son of a bitch, carrying on like this! Insulting people in front of a young lady!.."
 
-And immediately to Crooked:
+I pleaded with him not to stir up the scandal further, but he is a very hot-headed man and well-disposed toward us. He was all but ready to punch Crooked in the face.
 
-"Just in case, I will tear your head off! Damned insect! Son a bitch, after all this! Throwing insults around in presence of the lady!.."
+"Let me at him, I'll polish him off right now! I'll put his other eye out! This vile creature!.."
+
+And Crooked just muttered on like the wind, paying no heed at all. And Kirill Saveryanich pleaded with him:
+
+"You wish to ruin this young man - that is unconscionable! It is positively malicious on your part! The discussion concerned machines and the essence of life, and you have twisted it inside out to a political lining..."
+
+And that one kept jabbing a finger at his own chest and said again:
+
+"I know perfectly well what the 'lining' is! He's ruined my new jacket! I am not some ragamuffin!.. I have cultured manners!"
+
+"We shall see to that," said Kirill Saveryanich. "We'll send the jacket to an establishment and have it all cleaned. I have a cousin, too, who serves under Bookerman..."
+
+"It's not about the jacket!" he yelled. "Don't you try to reduce it all to my jacket! The substance is quite different! I have noble blood in my veins, and nothing you do can satisfy me! I may still consider it, but he must beg my pardon this instant!.."
+
+Of course, to keep things from flaring up, I whispered to Kolyushka:
+
+"Apologize... Come now, it's not worth it with a fellow like this..."
+
+"And I must have a brand-new jacket, without fail!"
+
+But Kolyushka rounded on me:
+
+"Me, apologize to such a parasite!.."
+
+"Ah! So I'm the parasite? Well then, I'll sh-show you!.."
+
+He instantly thrust a hand into his pocket - then pulled out a paper. It struck us all dumb.
+
+"We-ell, what's this?! A parasite? You asked for this yourselves - now swallow this official circular! Farewell."
+
+And with that he left. Kirill Saveryanich hurried after him, and I said to Kolyushka:
+
+"What are you doing to me? I raised you on my own blood, I got you exempted from fees by my diligent service... Ah?! And this is how you repay me! What is to become of us now?"
+
+"It was all in vain," he said, "that you troubled yourself and bowed to every scoundrel! It wasn't some street rabble, itching for their own cut, who paid for me... And perhaps Crooked isn't even to blame... Where there is carrion, there will be maggots."
+
+"What maggots?"
+
+"The kind that are green..." And he even laughed!..
+
+"What's with you?" I said sternly. "Who do you take yourself for?"
+
+"Nothing. Let's have some tea. You'll have to be at your restaurant soon..."
+
+"You, don't you pull the wool over my eyes," I said. "Watch yourself!"
+
+"You're a funny one! Why the long face? I only meant to protect you from an insult." 
+
+"Well done!" I said," Now he'll go to the magistrate about the jacket, report you to the police for the things you said... See what a piece of work he is? Now he can even cause trouble for you at the school..."
+
+And then Kirill Saveryanych came running, pale, waving his arms, twirling his tie in frustration.
+
+"He's gone! Must be to the precinct! And now they'll drag me into this mess with you... Everybody knows I am a peaceful man, and now, because of some kid, they'll get me too! Mark my words," he said. "I was talking about machines, and science, and about faith in God and patience... These are troubled times, and I'm sick enough even without politics... My business is going under..."
+
+He grabbed his hat and ran out. And without finishing the pie. What was to be done! I wanted to run after him, to ask his advice, but then I saw it was twenty to twelve: time to get to the restaurant. And it was a holiday, a busy day, I've got to stay on my toes.
+
+So I walked on, thinking: What on earth is going to happen now! What on earth is going to happen!
+
+## III
+
+And that same day, something trully bizarre happened at our restaurant. Ignatius Eliseich issued a new order:
+
+"Starting tomorrow, everyone should become more silent!"
 
 

content/rediscovering-roguelikes.en.md

@@ -0,0 +1,61 @@
++++
+date = '2026-03-17T00:56:25-04:00'
+title = 'Rediscovering Rougelikes'
+banner_left = '/rediscovering-roguelikes/rediscovering-roguelikes-banner-left.jpg'
+banner_right = '/rediscovering-roguelikes/rediscovering-roguelikes-banner-right.jpg'
+banner_title = 'The Binding of Isaac Afterbirth Art'
++++
+
+![Steam Recent Activity with The Binding of Isaac and Mewgenics](/rediscovering-roguelikes/steam-screenshot.jpg)
+
+After a long period of not playing games and trying to maintain a more "analogue" life, I snapped in February 2026 and dragged myself back into video games, just as I used to years ago. Now, after being extremely burnt out by terrible sleep habits, I finally let myself reflect in silence to find some "whys". If I fast-forwarded almost two entire months without doing anything that would make me proud, I can at least extract something useful from this time-consuming gaming binge.
+
+The fundamental thing that made me curious was that I actually never liked roguelike games, yet this is the exact genre I flushed all my time into now. You know, these games that feature procedural generation (levels, items, enemies) and permanent death, ensuring every run is unique. I never understood these games before, but now I play them exclusively. Why?
+
+I remember playing the flash version of [The Binding of Isaac](https://store.steampowered.com/app/113200/The_Binding_of_Isaac/) for the first time in the middle school, and judging by my achievements from that time, I beat it once but never unlocked "post-game" content because I hated the frustrating lack of control. I preferred linear shooters where I could memorize enemy locations and feel smarter than the "computer" because all variables were set in stone.
+
+To add more colors into the picture, I would always look up guides and walkthroughs every time I would feel actually challenged and pushed out of comfort zone. It didn't matter if it was me who actually figured out how to beat the game, the only thing I cared about was the completion, by any means, even cheating. It was as if progress didn't matter as long as I could receive a green checkmark and move on. 
+
+Obviously, it's a very narrowed and limited expectation of fun that robbed me of lots of expriences in games and in life. 
+
+Let's use Isaac as an example again. We start a run with one global goal in mind: to beat the end boss. The boss is on stage 8, which is very difficult, and we are on stage 1, so we are very weak. We don't know anything about the game, so we start exploring and trying things out. Eventually, you learn about the resources you have, such as keys, bombs, and different kinds of health containers. You start to memorise some of the active items and achieve specific combinations that you prefer. And you die a lot before you accidentally manage to beat the final boss!
+
+You remember this one cool item that helped you beat the game, and in every subsequent session you try to get it again, thinking it's the only way to avoid dying. With so many items in the game, it's a very frustrating mindset to have because you're not going to get what you want very often. This is why I initially stopped playing.
+
+Compare starting tear-bullet projectiles (light blue spheres)
+![Isaac shooting detault starting tears](/rediscovering-roguelikes/isaac-default-tears.gif)
+
+and laser:
+![Isaac with tech tears item](/rediscovering-roguelikes/tech-tears.jpg)
+
+The game became significantly easier. And now I now realize the benefit wasn't just the item itself, but its "hitscan" nature, which provides immediate impact compared to the character's slow-moving default projectiles. My early failures stemmed from low damage and my inability to control those standard bullets. Converting tears into hitscan is only one solution; I could also achieve such high fire rates that accuracy is no longer an issue, or rely on summons to fight while I focus on dodging. These are just a few ways to overcome the challenge without necessarily needing to master the basic shooting mechanics.
+
+For instance, I can turn tears into huge bombs and make it so they cover bigger area and lessen my chance to miss:
+![Isaac shooting with IPECAC tears](/rediscovering-roguelikes/ipecac.gif)
+
+Does that mean that I should now restart every single session for several items rather than just one? Not really. It's more that the game has many themes, and the better you become at it, the more themes you can recognise and choose to pursue.
+
+![Chart](/rediscovering-roguelikes/chart.jpg)
+
+So I just established 3 ways you can go after you discover your first item. 
+
+However, you may not find any items that let you progress in a way that you are comfortable with. Well, you could clear the entire floor and find as many items as possible to increase your chances of finding better items on the next floor (you can ensure that the items you discover on this floor do not appear again in the game (they can only appear once per playthrough)). Then you need to make sure you have bombs to destroy walls and find secret locations, money to access shops, and keys to open chests and doors. Perhaps you have too many health containers and would like to exchange them for money. Alternatively, you could enter arenas or rooms where you can sacrifice health for a chest. Alternatively, you might find a card that teleports you to a secret devil room where you can exchange health for rare items. You might also have an active item called Dice, which lets you randomly swap all items in the room for something else.
+
+Maybe you don't know what all these terms mean. And it doesn't really matter! What matters is that we have more goals now. 
+
+- The global goal is to kill the final boss.
+- In order to do so we need to, within a given run, to come up with a theme and build our items around it.
+- In order to do so we need to find these items.
+- In order to do so we need to properly manage our resources and act on every level in accordance to abundance or lack of any resource the game has.
+
+This is where the randomisation of every playthrough comes in. It's not about restarting your game until you win; rather, it's about creating a sandbox for decision-making and responsibility. Now it's clear why I didn't understand these games as a child: I didn't have enough experience of responsibility or of making my own decisions — in fact, I hated it. I always wanted to live in a safe space, follow instructions and get things done for the sake of getting things done, rather than for the process or experience. It took abandoning video games altogether and making significant life changes before I realised how it feels to make decisions and be happy about your own success.
+
+So, why am I talking about it now, going the extra mile to write this piece? I remember seeing a YouTube video preview once called 'How you play video games defines your personality', or something like that. I never watched it, but the title's statement now makes it all come together.
+
+If we think about The Binding of Isaac system in a more abstract way, we will obviously notice how it applies to our approach to real-life problems. There is a major goal and various ways to achieve it; each way defines the resources required. These ways can be seen in learning a language, finding a job, fixing a sleep schedule (which failed), and so on. Perhaps we can view videogames as a sandbox where we can create an experience and then reflect on it. Not in the sense that... I can feel like the protagonist in The Binding of Isaac and then think about it as I would a book, but in a gamified way. The story is an excuse for an interactive experience where you can test yourself and see how you behave and why. You can then safely change your approach to in-game problems and see how it turns out. And maybe you can then apply this to life. This is kind of cool.
+
+On the other hand, it may sound like I'm just trying to justify wasting so many hours on games after avoiding them for so long, but at least I've found something that sounds reasonable to say. Eventually, I'll burn out, hate it, and return to the good things in life - but we'll see.
+
+----------
+
+P.S: Yes, the screenshots feature different versions of The Binding of Isaac, but I don't care. Doesn't have anything to do with my points.

content/rediscovering-roguelikes.ru.md

@@ -0,0 +1,61 @@
++++
+date = '2026-03-17T00:56:25-04:00'
+title = 'Заново открываю для себя рогалики'
+banner_left = '/rediscovering-roguelikes/rediscovering-roguelikes-banner-left.jpg'
+banner_right = '/rediscovering-roguelikes/rediscovering-roguelikes-banner-right.jpg'
+banner_title = 'Арт из The Binding of Isaac Afterbirth'
++++
+
+![Steam Recent Activity with The Binding of Isaac and Mewgenics](/rediscovering-roguelikes/steam-screenshot.jpg)
+
+После очень долгого промежутка моей жизни, когда я пытался быть более "аналоговым", в том числе не играя в видеоигры, я слоался в Феврале этого года и затянул себя обратно, как было много лет назад. Сейчас, когда я окончательно выгорел и уничтожил остатки здорового распорядка сна, я могу посидеть в тишине и поразмышлять над некоторыми "почему". Раз уж я промотал целых два месяца жизни не делая ничего чем мог бы гордиться, я могу как минимум извлечь хоть что-нибудь полезно-применимое из этого игрового запоя.
+ 
+Основной интересующий меня вопрос состоит в том, что я до этого никогда не любил так называемые "рогалики", но это именно тот жанр, на который я убил всё последнее драгоценное время. Ну, "rogue-like", те самые игры с процедурной генерацией уровней, предметов, противников. Всё, чтобы каждый забег казался чем-то уникальным. Раньше я никогда не понимал эти игры, а чем играю только в них. Почему?
+
+Я помню, как я играл в оригинальную версию [The Binding of Isaac](https://store.steampowered.com/app/113200/The_Binding_of_Isaac/) первый раз ещё в средней школе, и если судить по моим достижениям того времени, я смог осилить её один раз и затем больше никогда не открывал, так как меня раздражало отсутствие контроля. Линейные шутеры мне были гораздо больше по душе: там можно было запомнить все уровни и ощущать себя настоящим мегамозгом по сравнению с "компьютером", без случайности и "рандома".
+
+Для полноты картины: при любых затруднениях я искал прохождения и гайды в интернете, лишь бы оставаться в некой игровой зоне комфорта. Для меня совсем не было важно, что это не мой опыт и что это не я решаю проблему - я просто хотел факт прохождения, абстрактную зелёную галочку над игрой, даже если для этого бы пришлось использовать читы.
+
+Очевидно, это очень ограниченные и скудные ожидания, и из-за этого я лишил себя интересного опыта и веселья. 
+
+Для примера возьмём снова "Айзека". Мы начинаем каждый забег с глобальной целью: победить финального босса. Босс на уровне 8, он очень сложный, мы на уровне 1, и мы очень слабы. Пока что мы не знаем ничего об игре, мы начинаем исследовать и пробовать разные штуки. Рано или поздно мы понимаем, какие у нас есть ресурсы и что с ними делать: бомбы, ключи, разные виды здоровья. Мы начинаем запоминать, какие в игре есть виды предметов, как их комбинировать вместе и так далее. И конечно мы много умираем перед тем как победить босса первый раз!
+
+Мы запоминаем вот тот самый один классный предмет, который нам помог пройти игру первый раз, и в следующих забегам мы пытаемся найти его снова, думая, что это наш единственный шанс продолжать выигрывать. Но с таким количеством разнообразных предметов и вероятностью получения одного-того-самого разочарование наступит очень быстро. Именно поэтому я перестал тогда играть.
+
+Просто сравните начальные пуле-слёзы (голубые сферы)
+![Isaac shooting detault starting tears](/rediscovering-roguelikes/isaac-default-tears.gif)
+
+и офигенный лазер:
+![Isaac with tech tears item](/rediscovering-roguelikes/tech-tears.jpg)
+
+Игра стала гораздо проще. И я сейчас понимаю, что это было не из-за этого предмета самого по себе, но из-за его "хитскана", то есть возможности ударять по противникам моментально, без задержки на преодоление снарядом дистанции, как при обычных пуле-слезах. Мои изначальные поражения все были из-за низкого урона и моей невозможности нормально контролировать снаряды, да, но превращение их в "хитскан" - это только одно из множества решений. Например, я мог бы ещё увеличить свою скорострельность, чтобы единичные промахи ничего не значили. Или я мог бы полагаться на призываемых существ, чтобы они сражались вместо меня, а сам я бы прятался и защищался. Это только несколько вариантов как можно обойти стороной стандартную неудобную стрельбу.
+
+Можно превратить пуле-слёзы в громадные бомбы, чтобы увеличить покрытие у уменьшить шанс промаха:
+![Isaac shooting with IPECAC tears](/rediscovering-roguelikes/ipecac.gif)
+
+Значит ли это, что теперь мне нужно перезапускать каждую сессию для нескольких предметов, вместо одного лазера? Не совсем. Тут скорее дело в том, что в игре множество различных "тем" прохождения, и чем лучше мы играем, чем больше мы её изучаем, тем больше тем мы можем распознать и выбрать для прохождения.
+
+![Chart](/rediscovering-roguelikes/chart-ru.jpg)
+
+Итак, у нас уже есть 3 способа, которыми мы можем решить проходить игру.
+
+Но может так случиться, что мы не найдём ни одного подходящего предмета. Тогда мы можем решить зачистить весь уровень на 100% чтобы увеличить шанс найти предметы получше на уровнях следующих (если найти предмет один раз, он больше не появится). Чтобы зачистить уровень, нам нужны бомбы для разрушения стен и открытия секретных комнат, нам нужны ключи для открытия сокровищниц, сундуков и лавок, нам нужны деньги, чтобы в этих лавках покупать предметы и те самые бомбы и ключи. Или мы можем зачищать арены или обменивать здоровье на ключи. Или можно найти вход в демоническую лавку и там обменять максимальное здоровье на редкие предметы. Или можно найти предмет "игральная кость" и случайно перемешивать предметы на полу, чтобы с некоторым шансом прямо сейчас выпало что-то получше, но ценой потери того, что уже есть.
+
+Может, для нас все эти игровые термины ещё ничего не значат. Но это и не важно! Важно то, что мы установили ещё больше целей, теперь локальных.
+
+- Главная цель - победить финального босса.
+- Чтобы это сделать, нам нужно, в течение одного забега, придумать конкретную сборку из предметов.
+- Чтобы это сделать, нужно эти предметы добыть.
+- Чтобы это сделать, нам необходимо правильно управлять нашими ресурсами и действовать на каждом уровне в соответствии с избытком или недостатком тех или иных ресурсов, которыми располагает игра.
+
+Здесь-то и проявляется суть рандомизации каждого прохождения. Это не про бесконечные перезапуски в ожидании победы, а про создание песочницы для принятия решений и ответственности. Теперь понятно, почему в детстве я не понимал такие игры: у меня не было опыта ответственности или принятия собственных решений - на самом деле, я это ненавидел. Мне всегда хотелось жить в безопасном пространстве, следовать инструкциям и доводить дела до конца просто ради галочки, а не ради процесса или опыта. Понадобился полный отказ от видеоигр и серьезные жизненные перемены, прежде чем я осознал, каково это - радоваться собственному успеху
+
+Так почему я говорю об этом сейчас и трачу столько сил на написание этого текста? Помню, как-то раз мне попалось превью видео на YouTube с названием в духе "То, как вы играете в видеоигры, определяет вашу личность". Я его так и не посмотрел, но сама суть этого заголовка теперь расставила всё по своим местам
+
+Если рассмотреть систему The Binding of Isaac более абстрактно, становится очевидно, как она применима к нашему подходу к реальным жизненным проблемам. Есть глобальная цель и разные пути её достижения, и каждый путь определяет необходимые ресурсы. Это прослеживается в изучении языка, поиске работы, исправлении режима сна (что провалилось) и так далее. Возможно, на видеоигры стоит смотреть как на песочницу, где можно прожить опыт, а затем отрефлексировать его. Не в том смысле, что... я могу почувствовать себя протагонистом игры и размышлять о нем, как о персонаже книги, а скорее в формате геймификации. Сюжет здесь - лишь повод для интерактивного опыта, где можно испытать себя, увидеть, как и почему ты себя ведешь. Можно в безопасной среде менять подход к игровым задачам и смотреть, что из этого выйдет. А потом, возможно, перенести это в жизнь. И это довольно круто
+
+С другой стороны, это может звучать так, будто я просто пытаюсь оправдать те многие часы, что потратил на игры после столь долгого перерыва. Но, по крайней мере, я могу хоть что-нибудь об этом рассказать. В конце концов, я перегорю, возненавижу всё это и вернусь к действительно важным вещам - там увидим. 
+
+----------
+
+P.S: Да, скриншоты из разных версий игры, но это всё равно. 

themes/lugo/layouts/_default/baseof.html

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