Before I speak of anything valuable, there is an itch to ramble for a bit and satisfy my ego. There are some questions—though I know no one would ever ask them—that I would like to answer. This serves two purposes. On one hand, it sets boundaries, drawing an imaginary circle to ground myself, as if to say, "This is why I am writing, why I bothered with this site, why I selected fonts, designed the layout, and so on."
Of course, I understand—perhaps better than most—that the mere ability to speak does not mean I have something to say. These days, everyone shouts from their corner, argues, asserts, and blames. Words like "specialist" and "it is proven" have long become mockeries. Information is abundant, yet the speed of thought has slowed so much that in some circles, individual consciousness has merged into a collective one—a development that bodes well for no one. It takes only two clicks to download any book, and if reading proves difficult, another two clicks will summon a summary.
Yes, I did want to confess in advance that I had nothing to say! There is no thought I can claim as my own, no idea I can in good conscience call new or offer as a revelation to lead others. Nor would I desire such a thing. When we begin anything, we rarely consider novelty at all. Instead, we think of our immediate surroundings. If we offer a hand to a friend, it is not to save the world. If we share our purest, most sincere experiences, we do so without believing them unique. Yet we share anyway, because those around us cannot possibly know everything happening in the world, every brilliant idea, no matter how remarkable.
Thus, I conclude that all my notes and records are what, under other circumstances, would become "outpourings" to those closest to me (and indeed, they have). If I deemed it worthy to spend my loved ones' time describing my interests, then I must have believed I had something to say. The only thing that matters here is my own impulse—not objective value, which I neither measure nor care to measure.
Even if I consider myself small-minded, unseasoned, blind to the world, a "product of our time," there is no basis to conclude I am forbidden to write. After all, I cannot be the only one. If we are all small-minded now, then we must share similar feelings. In such people, there may seethe anger—or a longing for something absent—and a drive to unite around a common cause, to seek like-minded souls, to form something greater than themselves, especially in our loud, sprawling world. If so, my creative process can be seen as an unconscious expression of this niche, these very people, so that my observations might resonate with them and, together, we might grow a little better.
Thus, though right now I am fueling my ego here and placing my lethargic opinions at the center, in my actual notes I will strive to focus on observation, application, and a "unifying principle"—whatever that means. Simply put, I will try to explain why an ancient insight might hold value today, filtered through the prism of my own inner, uneducated, and limited perspective as the author. By this definition, I deliberately reject "collecting," lists, "this summer I did X," "I listened to Y," "here are my purchases," "such is my activity," "7/10 plot, 9/10 characters," and other trivialities I once indulged in. I will avoid opinions couched as "it seems to me," for they hold no intrinsic worth and are boring.
I wholly reject presenting these thoughts in the format of a social network with feedback. Those who need to reach me already know how or will find my email on the main domain. Comments, links to "where to find me," and—heaven forbid—likes and upvotes corrupt and distract from the idea. And I still believe I have an idea (though those who know me also know I am weak and easily ensnared by such hooks).
I meant to explain why this particular image is in the background and what it means to me and my "idea." But I’ve changed my mind. Having typed nearly a thousand words, I’ll save it for a future post.
- Site developed on [HUGO](https://gohugo.io/) with theme [lugo](https://github.com/LukeSmithxyz/lugo)
- Background image is a fragment of [Lilac](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kyriak_Kostandi#/media/File:%D0%9A._%D0%9A%D0%BE%D1%81%D1%82%D0%B0%D0%BD%D0%B4%D1%96_%D0%A0%D0%BE%D0%B7%D0%BA%D0%B2%D1%96%D1%82%D0%BB%D0%B8%D0%B9_%D0%B1%D1%83%D0%B7%D0%BE%D0%BA,_1902.png) by Kyriak Kostiantynovych Kostandi.
- The source code and templates are on [Gita](https://code.htmlbyhand.online/NaiJi/write-html-by-hand-online)
